Help Me Out Please...
I am driving to Columbia, Missouri (2 hrs away) tomorrow morning for my daughter's soccer tournament. I'm dreading going because of today's events, and I was hoping to get some of my blends insight on this. I'm still quite upset about the whole thing.My ex informed me last week that another coach wants Kaylee to play on their team during the tournament. It is against tournament rules for a player to play on two teams. At first I was leaving this up to my ex, thinking he had the common sense to say no. I really shouldn't be suprised that he agreed to let her play on this other team. I am totally against this for several reasons. 1. It is against tournament rules. 2. If caught, this other team could get disqualified. 3. Kaylee's real team could be disqualified. 4. Both teams and Kaylee could be banned from future tournaments. 4. And most importantly in my opinion....this would send a negative message to our daughter.
Kaylee knows that it's against tournament rules and told me last week that she didn't think she should play on the other team. I agreed with her.
Normally, there aren't any issues between me and my ex, but whenever there is it's always regarding the kids sports. Many moons ago we agreed that the kids would only be on one team per season. This is an agreement that he has broken time and time again. Every time I turn around, he's signed her up for yet another team. Currently she is on three soccer teams and is still playing in basketball tournaments. Not only is he going against a rule HE made, but he's making it impossible to have a life! To date, I've been way too lenient, always giving in, as he's already done it, so why fight it? But this to me, is way more serious than keeping up with an overloaded schedule. This is about ethics. I mean, if we let her play, aren't we pretty much telling her that it's ok to cheat? That it's ok to bend the rules in order to win? That's not the message I want my child to receive! I tried to be assertive today, and it went on deaf ears and he actually laughed at me! So finally, I told him if he lets her play on this other team, then I would make sure she wouldn't play the rest of the tournament. I do have the directors name and phone number. But how can I do that? Kaylee just wants to play. I feel so torn it's not even funny. Am I really considering getting my own child disqualified? That would be punishing her for her dads actions. I can't do that to her. But what do I do? It seems that I never have a say when it comes to the kids sports, and I'm tired of it. I may have a different opinion (but doubtful) if this other team was short on players, but that's not the case with this. They have more than enough players. They want a "ringer." Kaylee is 11 years old, has been playing since she was 4 and is a high scorer. That's why this other coach wants her to play. And this is all going on behind the back of Kaylee's coach. Imagine her outrage if her team is disqualified because one of her team members illegally played on another team? And what about all of the other players? Is this fair to them? Kaylee's dad is a coach, so I am shocked that he would allow this. He actually told me, "if this coach is dumb enough to do it, I don't have a problem with it. He's the one who's putting his team on the line." I'm still in disbelief with his attitude. I won't be there when this other team is playing, so I won't know until after if he wised up. But right now, I still think he's going to do it. Call it a hunch, or him hanging up on me had something to do with it. What do you all think? Even those of you who don't have children should have an opinion on this. I'm curious. Am I just being a Big B, or is this completely unethical? Don't worry, you can be honest!
posted by Wolfie @ 10:29 PM
Comments: 6
